In the past few weeks I've talked about how I've been depressed. Some of this was due to the only person I really know leaving Washington to return to South Carolina. I haven't talked to Kaleb in about three months and I have to assume that it's because
- Robert's family doesn't want him to have contact with me.
- Kaleb has forgotten about me.
In addition I'd been a bit lonely and initiated a relationship based on sex with an individual who was more interested in satisfying his own needs than making our activities enjoyable for us both.
For the past six months or so, I've been struggling financially and but have been able to just keep my head above water.
With the new year I received a raise and a promotion and I'm only a few months away from paying off my car, all of which promises to put me back in the black and I can soon go back to the lifestyle to which I am accustomed.
In addition, I decided a few weeks ago to be more proactive in my life and set about starting up a Pagan Study Group. To that end, I cast a spell to attract those of like mind and created a new witchvox account. Rather than place an advertisement for a forming group, I went through all the ads in and around my town and sent an introductory email to those I felt would be receptive to the idea.
While training for my new position at a different location I was fortune to meet two additional pagans and after getting to know them a little I told them about my idea to start a Wiccan Study Group, as opposed to a coven.
I envision a study group first with the possibility of growing into a coven. I believe that study group will help us all get to know each other, (re)examine our beliefs, and get us all on the same page. Though I'm being proactive in forming the group, I've made it clear that I'm not looking to be the leader, guru, expert; I want to surround myself with people who are going to be actively engaged in what we are doing, and contribute to our goals.
Fortunately, I was able to get everyone here on the same night. We got along well and we came up with some great ideas for study and application, including:
- Examination of Wiccan/Pagan beliefs and practices.
- Active Ritual
- Field Trips
- Healing Circles
- Pagan Themed Book Club
- Pagan Themed Movie Night and discussion.
Thought I have high hopes for our little group, I know how quickly things can fall apart, people lose interest, schedules conflict. I've made a promise to myself that I'm going to do whatever I can to make this a success, but I aknowledge that there really is much that is out of my hands. Ultimatly I cannot control five other people, force them to show up, talk, contribute, etc...so if it fails I won't be blaming myself...at least I'm doing something different.